Thursday, June 4, 2026

Favorite Student Blunders and Bloopers: 2024-2026

 It's that time of year again, time to revel in the hilarious misspelling, malapropism, or just plain goof. If you recognize your work here, know that my respect for you remains high, but you did give me a chuckle--a chuckle I want to share with others. 

(Since I apparently never posted last year's bloopers, they are included here as well!)


A.D. 2024-25


“Princess Diana of Whales is the best person my Aunt Mary can be compared to.”

“You are most defiantly going to need to know how to write well during your classes.”

“Beast your eyes on the water which is plummeting down on the mountain!”

“Love God, He will life you up; deny Him, He will cast you down.”

“The background knowledge on the Iliad (like Paris and Helen's story, the gods, and the Treaty of Versailles) is very helpful.”

What three creatures does Socrates “model” and compare the tripartite nature of man to in Book IX? “The Lion, which is the passion, the man, which is the ration, and the multiheaded beast, which is the animation.”

What was Aesop’s social class? “Aesop was thought to be a salve.”

“If a man’s animal nature takes over, Plato might call him greedy or glutinous; lazy or undisciplined.”

“Fear, honnor and intersections were the 3 reason thucydided said a nation went to war.”

“God promised that David would have a descendent on the thrown forever.”

Thrasymachus’ definition of justice: “It was the advantage of the stronger or might makes write.”

“Thucydides said Athens had a strong navel.”

“This being a fun story, I figured I'd retell it just as it is. I wanted it kind of like a pudding for thought: not too potent but enough to keep the reader entertained and feeling better after the read.”

“During the Fenaissance, people began to experiment with the flute.”

“Lucretius did not believe in a diving power ruling over the world.”

“Christianity didn’t completely ride the world of warfare, but it changed the terms and promoted a better way of life.”


A.D. 2025-26


“Christmas should not be celebrated in corporeal worship.”

“Individuals who are not capable of repeating should not be baptized.”

“I call to the people to not give up and coward away but to get up and fight. For if we coward away we are also giving up not just the fight but this nation.”

“Arius believed in the creation of the sun.”

What was at stake in the medieval “Investiture Conflict” from the 1100-1200s? “In the medieval times of 1100-1200s, the problem of “Investiture Conflict” was around.”

“Arius and his followers believed there was a time when the Son of God was naught.”

“As the light trickled in through a small window, Boethius’ fate sat upon his mind like a gamer on his mom’s couch.”

“All humans encounter leadership in their lives: weather in the family; a father leading the wife and children, or perhaps the older child leading the younger ones.”

“It could be anything from Christians and the story of the crucifiction, to how Aeneas founded Britain.”

“A biproduct of this lack of Christian values in public school, has opened up many temptations for kids.”

“The principals America was founded on will carry her to the moon.”

“I do think that our education is better than what the medevils had and if they saw us they would be green with envy.”

“Education now has lost a little of its meaning and talent is forced into a uniform box till disheartened, insert buff dog meme, old english literature, I am a tale of knights and dragons still read 800 years later.” (Editor's note--???)

“The Pax Romana allowed Jesus to be born into a stable world.”

“Marcus Aurelias followed Stoichsism.”

What was the 1st Triumvirate? “The three big cheeses of 60 B.C.”

In a single essay, a student spelled “medieval” four different ways: “medeval,” “medevil,” “midevial,” and “midvial.” (He never did get it right.)