Favorite Student Blunders and Bloopers: 2024-2026

 It's that time of year again, time to revel in the hilarious misspelling, malapropism, or just plain goof. If you recognize your work here, know that my respect for you remains high, but you did give me a chuckle--a chuckle I want to share with others. 

(Since I apparently never posted last year's bloopers, they are included here as well!)

A.D. 2024-25

“Princess Diana of Whales is the best person my Aunt Mary can be compared to.”

“You are most defiantly going to need to know how to write well during your classes.”

“Beast your eyes on the water which is plummeting down on the mountain!”

“Love God, He will life you up; deny Him, He will cast you down.”

“The background knowledge on the Iliad (like Paris and Helen's story, the gods, and the Treaty of Versailles) is very helpful.”

What three creatures does Socrates “model” and compare the tripartite nature of man to in Book IX? “The Lion, which is the passion, the man, which is the ration, and the multiheaded beast, which is the animation.”

What was Aesop’s social class? “Aesop was thought to be a salve.”

“If a man’s animal nature takes over, Plato might call him greedy or glutinous; lazy or undisciplined.”

“Fear, honnor and intersections were the 3 reason thucydided said a nation went to war.”

“God promised that David would have a descendent on the thrown forever.”

Thrasymachus’ definition of justice: “It was the advantage of the stronger or might makes write.”

“Thucydides said Athens had a strong navel.”

“This being a fun story, I figured I'd retell it just as it is. I wanted it kind of like a pudding for thought: not too potent but enough to keep the reader entertained and feeling better after the read.”

“During the Fenaissance, people began to experiment with the flute.”

“Lucretius did not believe in a diving power ruling over the world.”

“Christianity didn’t completely ride the world of warfare, but it changed the terms and promoted a better way of life.”

A.D. 2025-26

“Christmas should not be celebrated in corporeal worship.”

“Individuals who are not capable of repeating should not be baptized.”

“I call to the people to not give up and coward away but to get up and fight. For if we coward away we are also giving up not just the fight but this nation.”

“Arius believed in the creation of the sun.”

What was at stake in the medieval “Investiture Conflict” from the 1100-1200s? “In the medieval times of 1100-1200s, the problem of “Investiture Conflict” was around.”

“Arius and his followers believed there was a time when the Son of God was naught.”

“As the light trickled in through a small window, Boethius’ fate sat upon his mind like a gamer on his mom’s couch.”

“All humans encounter leadership in their lives: weather in the family; a father leading the wife and children, or perhaps the older child leading the younger ones.”

“It could be anything from Christians and the story of the crucifiction, to how Aeneas founded Britain.”

“A biproduct of this lack of Christian values in public school, has opened up many temptations for kids.”

“The principals America was founded on will carry her to the moon.”

“I do think that our education is better than what the medevils had and if they saw us they would be green with envy.”

“Education now has lost a little of its meaning and talent is forced into a uniform box till disheartened, insert buff dog meme, old english literature, I am a tale of knights and dragons still read 800 years later.” (Editor's note--???)

“The Pax Romana allowed Jesus to be born into a stable world.”

“Marcus Aurelias followed Stoichsism.”

What was the 1st Triumvirate? “The three big cheeses of 60 B.C.”

In a single essay, a student spelled “medieval” four different ways: “medeval,” “medevil,” “midevial,” and “midvial.” (He never did get it right.)

Favorite Student Blunders and Bloopers 2023-24

 It's that time again--time to revel in the slips and the slops, the misunderstandings and the falling short, the errors and the mistakes. Here are my favorite moments from my students of the last school year--and if you don't get it, make sure you read it again! Enjoy, and don't forget to chuckle!

“Rage—sing, goddess, of the rage of Peleus’s son Achilles,/Murderous, doomed, that cost the Achaeans countless losses,/Hurling down to the house of death so many sturdy souls,/Great fighter’s souls, but made their bodies carry-ons…”

“The storm eschewed rage, and the ship drowned in that rage.” 

Favorite Student Blunders and Bloopers of 2022-23

 It's that time of year again--classes are over, the pressure is off, and we can all laugh at the small stuff. Here is a collection of some of my favorite mistakes, blunders, malapropisms, or slips of the 22-23 school year. If any of my students read this, don't be embarrassed--such errors simply make me laugh and love you more. Enjoy!

In the place of honor, my absolute favorite of the year: “Martin Luther wrote the 95 Theses against the Catholic practice of selling pennants.”  😆🚩🚩🚩

"To explain my upbringing of this statement, I observed an assertion that Socrates had placed forth to Adeimantus about gods, specifically, God.”

“From these questions and comments, Socrates deducted these facts into a paragraph which I will announce as follows”

“Louisa wrote many works but had limited acknowledgment until her autobiographical Little Women was released, from which, she contracted fame.”

Favorite Student Bloopers of 2021-2022

 It's that time again--time to revel in the hasty misspelling, the overlooked word, or the unconscious alteration. Not to mention a few good old fashioned instances of ignorance...

“In my opinion the writer obviously tried to make the point of Roland being a brave worrier with strength and might.”

“Solomon was led astray by his desire to worship idles.”

“She has climbed great and risky hills and braved some deranged and treacherous rivers.”

“The Apocrypha was written in Greek because the land it was written in was concurred by Alexander."

“Shakespeare wrote in iambic pintometer.”

“Promises to futile lords were what the entire economy was built on.”

“In the Medical Catholic Church, the Bible was kept in Latin.”

“Fabian Tactics are a form of Gorilla Warfare where instead of attacking your enemy head on, you wear them down.”

“The Jewish Temple furnishings were carved into the Archer Titus.”

(Or, alternatively) “The Temple furnishings can still be seen on the italics.”

“The Pax Romana was a piece of Rome."

And my personal favorite from last year, as an honorable mention:

In answer to the question, “What was the name of the famous speech Cicero delivered against Mark Antony?” a Canadian student answered, “The 2nd Amendment.”